You ever do something that you thought you never would? You know like sky diving, illicit drugs, drunken lesbian experiences (ladies, you can e-mail me full details in 800 words or less…video too if you have it), or killing a hobo. Well, that’s what this is for me. Yes, for me anyway, writing a blog is like two beer soaked college girls making out and than repeatedly stabbing a beloved 20th century stereotype of American homelessness.

I never got the whole blog craze. “But you’re a writer,” people would say. “It should be right up your alley.” The whole concept just seemed like white noise to me-as if everyone was trying to talk at once. And the most prominent examples struck me as moronic and insipid narcissism, just read any celebrity’s “official” Web site and soak up the overused exclamation points and texting abbreviations if you don’t agree with me (The CIA should seriously consider using Kim Kardashian’s blog for interrogation purposes.). The word alone is probably one of the most hideous arrangements of a vowel and consonants in the English language. It rolls off the tongue like vomit and leaves the same taste. And then they slap an “-ing” at the end of it to make it a verb. “Blogging” sounds like some sort of sex act and not even a good one (though I would enjoy saying, “Oh man, I was totally blogging this girl last night!”). And when something sounds like it may be dirty, the mainstream media wants to get in on it. Professional MTV reality show contestants “write” about how awesome the new season is going to be and CNN cuts to an overweight partisan hack who runs his or her own web site (which somehow gives their opinion credence) with the title “blogger” under their name. “I’ve got better things to do,” I thought and went back to writing page upon page of work which I was too scared to ever show anyone.

So what changed my mind to make me want to start a blog? Well, like most everything that you swear you’ll never do, it just takes getting mixed up with the wrong crowd. When I discovered that one of my friends not only ran his own blog, which he contributed to practically daily, but had been doing so for almost year, I was shocked. It was like discovering that my father was living a secret gay lifestyle, and then writing about it online for everyone to read. He showed me his process for writing posts and interacting with his readers (You can checkout his blog here). And it seemed like a lot of fun.

The whole thing reminded of these lectures from professors who specialized in studying digital media that I sat through in college. “You missed it,” they used to say. “Your generation missed the heyday of the Internet.” To them, when people first started plugging their computers into phones line and connecting with each other, when it was just that bright green text on a black screen, it was pure and honest. It wasn’t about Google hits or porn, but human connection and sharing ideas. But when corporate America got interested in the technology for marketing purposes, they turned this new form of sincere two-way human interaction into just another television, a one-way medium. Maybe blogs are a way to get back to those original ideals of the Internet. That what I had always thought of as a self-centered need to express one’s opinions was just honesty. That the people who I had ridiculed had more courage than I ever did.

When I asked my friend if there was any advice he could give me about starting a blog, He told me that I should “write about things that are funny.  Like boobs.  That are funny-looking.” After a noticeably uncomfortable silence, he added that I shouldn’t be surprised if the only ones who end up reading my blog are my cat and brother. “It takes time to build an audience,” he said. “And really, chances are your brother is lying and your cat just reads it because he feels bad for you, so just be patient.”

Patience aside, I’m worried (and not just because I don’t have a cat and I’m an only child). Maybe no one will read this, maybe someone will and hate it—and then (worst of all) seek me out to tell me how lame I am. When I told another friend who blogs about the subject of this post, how I thought I’d never do a blog, she sighed. “Yeah, that’s pretty much everyone’s first post,” she said. Great, I’m not even that original. I’ve got a lot of work to do…